SF Counseling Center


Low Self-Esteem, Fear of Rejection and Lack of Intimacy: Three Common Sources of Relationship Problems

These three common issues: low self-esteem, fear of rejection and lack of intimacy seem to constellate in many relationships and often cause subtle, gradual but very significant damage to the relationship.  They can act quietly, like an undiagnosed illness in the background – eating away at the fabric of the relationship.  Often, what is left is bickering and fighting – which may actually be an unconscious attempt at establishing some form of intimacy – even if it is a negative way (better than not at all!).

10 Important Reasons Being in a Relationship is So Hard

Have you ever wondered why being in a relationship is so hard? We are going to explore 10 important factors. But, first let’s start with a metaphor. I wake up in the morning and decide to check my email. Sometimes my computer drops the connection with my router; it is confused by the signals of all of …

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5 Important Sources of Relationship Disappointment

Is this you?  You are in a relationship for over a year, and now you feel anger, disappointment, resentment, and stress?  It all seemed to be going great.  Your partner is fun and attractive.  Why aren’t things going as they should? There can be several reasons, here are the top 5: Communication (or really, lack …

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10 Easy Tips to Help You Improve Your Relationship

Here is a “Top 10” list of tips that can help you improve your relationship.  These tips come from our experience with individual, couples and group therapy.  Here goes: 1. Don’t blame your partner.          Often times we expect our partner to be perfect (despite the fact that we are not!).  We often hold our …

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Premarital Counseling

Marriage poses a paradox. We really do best in a marriage when we can be mature, understand our limitations and foibles and learn to be patient/mature with our spouse. However, there are strong regressive pulls in marriage. We often look to our partner to make up for things in our family of origin. We can benefit from appreciating the wonderful qualities of our partner, even from a dreamy perspective – however, we really do need to balance the dreaminess with the patience that comes from mature love.